The Freedom of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is powerful.
I used to believe that forgiving meant letting someone off the hook. I used to believe it was for the other person, and you had to be a martyr to forgive. I used to think that forgiving was equal to excusing. That the other person had to be sorry. I thought forgiveness equaled weakness.
How wrong I was. Now I know better.
Forgiveness isn’t a feeling. It’s hard work. Sometimes the hardest work you’ve ever done. It’s a choice. And not just a one time choice. It’s a choice you have to make over and over again. Sometimes daily. Sometimes hourly.
Forgiving is never for the other person. It isn’t dependent on if they feel sorry or even care about or recognize the damage they caused. Forgiving is the choice to unbind yourself from the hurt and pain. It is the commitment to free yourself and to decide that no one else has power over your life. It is letting go of dwelling in the idea that things should have been different.
Forgiveness is hard. But forgiveness is FREEDOM.
When you forgive, you aren’t excusing bad behavior or erasing your experience. You’re not saying that it didn’t happen, wasn’t significant, or that it was ok.
You are just making the choice not to let unforgiveness hold your peace hostage.
We all have someone to forgive. We all need forgiveness, too. Sometimes it’s our own selves we need to forgive.
The hard work of forgiving is worth it. Forgiving isn’t weak. It is the most powerful thing you will ever do.